Supporting Preschoolers: Fear, Resilience & Boundaries

Understanding Your Child’s Fears

Fears are a normal part of growing up. Monsters under the bed, strangers, or even loud noises can be intimidating for pre-schoolers. Understanding these fears is the first step in helping them.

When your child expresses fear, validate their feelings. Say things like, ‘I understand you’re scared. It’s okay to feel that way.’ Avoid dismissing their fears as silly. Instead, reassure them with your presence and support.

Set Clear and Loving Boundaries

Boundaries are essential for helping children feel safe and secure. When setting boundaries, be clear and consistent. For example, set a bedtime and stick to it. Firm boundaries make children feel protected and loved. Remember to explain why certain rules exist. For instance, ‘We wash our hands before eating to keep germs away.’ Clear boundaries teach kids self-control and respect for others.

Building Routine and Consistency

Children thrive on routine. Having a consistent schedule reduces anxiety and provides a sense of security. Stick to regular meal times, playtimes, and bedtimes. When changes are necessary, prepare your child in advance. Explain what will happen and answer any questions they may have. This predictability helps children feel more in control and less fearful of the unknown.

Encouraging Open Communication

Open communication with your child is key to understanding their world. Encourage them to talk about their day, what they enjoyed, and what scared them. Sharing your own experiences can be reassuring. For instance, I was scared of the dark too when I was your age. This builds trust and helps them feel heard and understood.

Fun and Safe Risk-Taking

Kids need to experience safe risk-taking to build resilience. Encourage activities that challenge them, like climbing a little higher at the playground or trying a new game. Praise their efforts and courage, regardless of the outcome. This helps them learn that it’s okay to take risks and that failure is a part of learning. Avoid overprotecting them, and let them explore within safe limits.

Model Resilience and Positivity

Children learn by watching adults. Model resilience by handling your own challenges calmly and positively. Share how you handle stress and setbacks. Show them that it’s okay to make mistakes and that what’s important is to keep trying. Use humor to lighten tough situations. Laughter can be a great way to connect and diffuse fear. Celebrate small victories together to build a positive mindset.